• Working with Stuff

    Holding Beliefs for Others… and When Not To

    My realisation went like this: “I am not going to carry beliefs for them* any more. I am done. No more.” *Them being “men”. Men in general. I am not altogether clear on what this meant, so I’m going to try to find clarity by writing about it here. “Holding Beliefs for Others” Holding Beliefs for other people can be a wonderful practice, if done consciously. Like when I hold a belief for my friend. It works like this: When she’s having trouble believing good things for herself, I hold that belief for her. I say “I believe you are amazing, and you are capable of awesome things in this…

  • Stories of my life,  Working with Stuff

    The Myth of Perfection

    There’s this quote by Brene Brown that became really popular: “You’re imperfect, and you’re wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging.” That sounds really cute an’ all, but what does it actually mean? I think I’ve found an answer. And it came to me by way of someone else’s wisdom: “life is hard sometimes, and we aren’t told that when we are kids” Ah. Yes. I have a story, and it involves my hairy legs. Growing Hairy Legs When I reached puberty, at around the age of 12, I began to grow hair on my legs. Much like everyone else. Except that, for me, it seemed…

  • Stories of my life,  Working with Stuff

    The Challenge of Receiving Love

      Sometimes people are so kind to me that I just… can’t… take it. I break. I burst into tears. It’s too much. It’s also important, and necessary. Breaking and bursting into tears I like to think of it as “growing my heart”, preparing myself for receiving greater and greater love. I don’t have the best track record at “receiving” love. I’ve been in 3 abusive relationships after all. And I’m determined to not be in any more. So, growing my heart it is. Preparing myself for receiving greater and greater love. Actually, let’s talk about abusive relationships for a minute I do not believe that the reason some people…