• Stuff you can try,  Working with Stuff

    Being Single Alone

      It’s Valentine’s Day, or as we call it on this website, “Valiant Day”, and since this time tends to wreck the nerves of us single people, I thought I would come out of my Writer’s Block to share the best advice I can give you on how to deal with singleness in a world of coupledness. And that advice is:   “You do not talk about being single with people who are coupled”.   Now you may be thinking “whaaat?”, so don’t worry, I will expand on this. And if you regularly find yourself in painful conversations with your coupled friends, you may want to read until the end.  …

  • Help in a crisis

    Life Breaks Us All

    Life will break you. It’s not because you have done anything wrong, it’s because that’s what life does. It breaks us over and over, so that we may awaken. Of course we don’t like it. In fact, if we didn’t fight it, the process wouldn’t work: it’s the struggle that leads to the breakthrough. That’s why aboriginal societies took their young people through “coming of age” rituals. To break them. They knew that in time life breaks us all, and it’s best to be prepared for it. They would purposely break them to teach them how to find the light. So that when life breaks them, as it does all…

  • Working with Stuff

    Holding Beliefs for Others… and When Not To

    My realisation went like this: “I am not going to carry beliefs for them* any more. I am done. No more.” *Them being “men”. Men in general. I am not altogether clear on what this meant, so I’m going to try to find clarity by writing about it here. “Holding Beliefs for Others” Holding Beliefs for other people can be a wonderful practice, if done consciously. Like when I hold a belief for my friend. It works like this: When she’s having trouble believing good things for herself, I hold that belief for her. I say “I believe you are amazing, and you are capable of awesome things in this…

  • Stories of my life,  Working with Stuff

    The Myth of Perfection

    There’s this quote by Brene Brown that became really popular: “You’re imperfect, and you’re wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging.” That sounds really cute an’ all, but what does it actually mean? I think I’ve found an answer. And it came to me by way of someone else’s wisdom: “life is hard sometimes, and we aren’t told that when we are kids” Ah. Yes. I have a story, and it involves my hairy legs. Growing Hairy Legs When I reached puberty, at around the age of 12, I began to grow hair on my legs. Much like everyone else. Except that, for me, it seemed…