Eternal Worth Strengthening Elixir

So. Here I was, trying to explain what the Widdershins way is all about when I find myself procrastinating with a big case of writer’s block.
(Not the kind of thing you want to have days after you’ve launched your awesometastic website.)

What did I do? I put the techniques into action and engaged with the “block”. This is what happened next…

First: Venting.

Putting into words the feeling under the surface, in the feelings own voice.

“I don’t know what to do. I don’t know anything! I don’t know enough about anything to help anyone! I don’t know the “techniques”. And I don’t know what to do!”

Second: I describe it from my “own” perspective

This way I distance myself from the anxious feeling I’m having at the moment. Now it’s “me” having a “feeling”, whereas before it was “me being a big feeling of anxiety”.

I seem to be under the impression that I don’t know anything about anything. It’s a nagging feeling of insecurity: I can’t help people because “I don’t know enough”.

Third: I talk to the “feeling”

I give it a voice. That way it can be as anxious and upset as it wants to be. And by talking to it, the feeling will tell me what it’s doing there.

IMPORTANT: I’m trying to find out why my feeling is convinced that I “don’t know anything about anything”. It’s important that I don’t try to deny its perception of reality by going “oh, but of course I know lots”. That won’t work. If a part of me is worried, then it has a legitimate reason to be worried.

The Dialogue

Hello part of me who seems to think I don’t know enough. You appear to be… let’s see… confused. Anxious. Upset.

“I don’t know what to do!!!”

Let’s see… You don’t seem to want to do what I’m trying to do… We were trying to write about the way widdershins works…

“but I don’t know! I DON’T KNOW HOW IT WORKS!!!”

Ok, that’s fine, if that’s what you’re feeling, that’s what you’re feeling. I’m sensing a lot of feeling behind this “I don’t know”. Upset, hurt, scared.

“Also, I have no idea how we are going to make money out of this. And unless you sort this out, all the writing is going to be pointless!”

Oh… I see… You are trying to stop me from working on something that does not nourish me…

“YES! I want you to live a beautiful life, and that’s not going to happen if you carry on forever writing things and never charging money for it”

Ok. Let’s see… How do you feel about writing a business plan?

“NOOOO!!! That’s too scary!!!. (And yes, I do know we are meeting that Business helping woman tomorrow. But I’m scared about that)”

Why are you scared?

“Because… what if I write about making money and then it doesn’t happen and then I feel even more sad, and upset and depressed and worthless forever!!!”

Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry!

Let’s see… It sounds like I have put too much emphasis on “getting somewhere” as a measure of my “worth”. And I could try strengthening my belief that my worth is not linked in any way to my “getting anywhere”. I know this to be true, but it doesn’t “feel” true… yet.
So there’s this belief… and we could have a “strengthening elixir” for it… or something equally cartoony and whacky. Because it sounds fun.

“Sounds awesome! How should we call it?”

Hmmm… let me think…  “eternal worth strengthening elixir” (to emphasise the fact that our worth is not related in any way to where we are, what we do, or anything else; it’s a quality of our soul).  And this elixir lives in a really nice colourful bottle… the kind that you’d find in Howl’s moving castle. Because of course.

“WOW! That does sound really magical! But how does it work?”

Let’s see… Well, this tonic lives in that magical realm of “everything is possible, because it’s not the real world and we are all playing make believe here”. (Yes, that’s the world we used to live in when we were children.)

“And this is the world we get to play in now that we have discovered “Buddhist” stuff, right? The whole “anything is possible” and “the world is not the way we think it is” and “what’s real is not all that solid or all that real”

Yes. This is precisely it. So, since this elixir lives in that world, we need to walk into that world for it to work.

“Awesome! And we totally turn widdershins to get there!”

You bet! So. We turn widdershins and arrive to this “imaginary but real” world and we take the elixir and it works.

“wooow…”

And suddenly all our associations with “worth” and “getting somewhere in society” are gone

“And that totally makes sense because in the Widdershins universe we are totally challenging this concept that “our worth” comes from “getting somewhere”. So this elixir can totally be for the people who turn widdershins and come to this world, but who still need reminding that this is a new world and the old rules no longer apply”

YES! This debilitating old rules!

“Totally! They are debilitating! Which is why we need a strengthening elixir! We need that extra bit of help to fully absorb the idea that “the rules over here are different”.”

What an awesome thing this elixir is proving to be…

“Fantastic”

And then I drew it…

Now I’m really happy. Because instead of “explaining” to you how this works, I have actually shown you the “technique” the way I use it.