• Stories of my life,  Working with Stuff

    Triggered

    Triggers. They are no fun, to put it *very* mildly. In case you don’t know what a trigger is (like I didn’t) here’s what they look like for me. I see something, or hear something, and all of a sudden a memory of a Horrible Moment in my life shows up and I can’t stop feeling distressed. The memory won’t go away, the distress won’t go away, and I can no longer function. That’s what happens to me “now”. What used to happen, back before I started working with my stuff, is that I would see something I seriously disapproved, I would proceed to lose my marbles completely, the “thing”…

  • Working with Stuff

    Giving Legitimacy to our Feelings

    One of the reasons why we end up in this fabulous world of Feminism is because… we need strength in our beliefs. We don’t like something “in the mainstream”. We “feel” it’s wrong, or at least “wrong for us”. And so we learn to reject it on sound political and rational grounds. What we are doing is “borrowing strength” from each other to be able to say “I do not want this”. Seeking permission from each other to “not be ok with this mainstream thing”. It’d be wonderful if it worked… But it kinda… doesn’t. Here’s the thing: if there’s something “in the mainstream” which you “feel” to be wrong……

  • My Thoughts on the World,  Social

    Reading “Vagina” – From Anger to Compassion

    WARNING! I briefly mention trauma, but I also discuss a pathway to healing. Read only if you’re ready.   As you know, I fall out with “Feminism” on an almost daily basis. It looks like this: “THAT’s IT! I’m done with Feminism! I’M DONE WITH FEMINISTS! They can all go to…” etc The reason for this fall out came courtesy of reading Naomi Wolf’s latest book “Vagina” the other day, for my Feminist Book Club. I had read the reviews, written by famous and worldly feminists, and now I’ve read the book I was really pissed off. At feminists, mostly. OK, at the feminists who reviewed the book in particular.…