Weekly Log copy

Weekly Log #26: Extreme Inexplicable Distress

My weekly ritual for looking at the week that was.

Weekly Log copy

This week contained Extreme Inexplicable Distress.
Why? I don’t know. It was inexplicable!

Let’s log.

  • Lots and lots of crying. Like, mad, hysterical sobbing. Extreme Inexplicable Distress! Extremely distressful and extremely inexplicable. Argh.
  • More exploring with friend. The seaside is getting a lot of exploring this winter.
  • Re-configurations of the living space. Things are changing. A breath for wanting even more change than this.
  • And another breath for this intuition that big changes are a-coming. A breath for the fear that they may not come. A breath for the strength and courage to change things.
  • I asked a difficult ask. I am giving myself a lot of sparkle points for this.
  • Lack of progress in the teeth department. Honestly, seriously, come on!!!
  • Spent time with friends. I have a Totoro! Friends are the best.
  • Lots of time spent “numbing out” or “checking out”. A breath for patience, for being kind to myself even when I’m not making the best choices.
  • Clarity. And progress. They are showing up in teeny tiny drops. Finally.

Moments of Insight

I had this insight during meditation:

“Acting from a place of “It’s going to happen soon” will make you calmer. And that is what we want, to be calmer. Nevermind whether it happens “soon” or not. The feeling is what we are truly after”.

So now, as it often happens, it no longer rings true. Argh!
And yet, I know that all the self-help/spirituality books say the same thing: it starts with the feeling.
So. I’m gonna keep trying to feel the calm.

Things of Considerable Worth (Un-missables!)

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To be honest, I thought I was gonna stop logging this week.
But I did it. I am here.
I get sparklepoints for that.