Christmas happened! And we survived it!
- Christmas Eve. The most fun Christmas Eve I could have imagined. Super friend and I spent the ultimate friend’s night, complete with house bunnies, copious amounts of ogling at topless Ryan Gosling, cheesecake and discussions on the merits of the new “Annie” movie (Big NO!) and Buddhism’s take on all of life’s ups and downs.(ie: “back to the meditation cushion”)
- Christmas Day, morning. Hell yeah! Excellent breakfast of bacon, eggs and muffins with barbacue sauce :D. Really happy to not wake up and be on my lonesome.
- Christmas Day, rest of day. Spent the day with Zen Friends, going to the middle of the wilderness (ie: a few miles away from the city) and hiking in a forest and climbing up a hill. Starry sky, a wish wished. Also: Miranda. Also: DOWNTON ABBEY!.
- Boxing Day: sales! Finally I get to buy the things I need, ‘cuz they are all cheaper! Foundt he perfect parka (badly needed) and the bobbly hat.
- Also, sadness. There was sadness these days. I had pretty strong suicidal feelings. A breath for being ok with what is.
- Grateful. More than grateful, in fact. I don’t know how it is possible for me to have the friends I have, but there they are, and surprising as it might seem (to me!), they keep on being there. Truly, truly moved.
- Toothache. Bad news from dentist. So much sadness, so much stress.
- Feelings of sadness re: the accident. I am left uglier and nothing much has changed. No good came of it. And my life is still the same, just poorer and uglier than before and I am so, so sad and unhappy about it.
Moments of Insight
You don’t build a strong safety net by getting real good at not falling.
And you don’t even begin to build a safety net if you think you will never fall.
Some people are good at believing that they will never fall.
Or that they will fall and that things will work out anyway.
Some of us are not like that. We need the reassurance of a safety net we have built ourselves.
This character trait cannot be changed, in my humble opinion. We cannot fool ourselves into thinking that there is a safety net, or into having the confidence to not care whether things will work out.
So if you do care, if you can’t stop thinking about how horrible it would be to fall… Just build your safety net.
(Moment of Insight on Christmas Day, and I don’t even remember writing it)
Things of Considerable Worth (Un-missables!)
It’s Christmas! So this week’s Un-missables are extra, extra special.
- The “bed scene” in the movie “Crazy Stupid Love”, between Ryan Gosling’s character and Emma Stone’s.
This is one of those rare things I like to call an “un-cliche”.
The scene starts out being a total cliche, and then it turns around completely, being both awesome, romantic and unexpected.
If, like me, you “can’t handle sex scenes” to the point of covering the screen with your hand if there’s so much as a kiss, then this scene is actually safe for you. Just watch!
And if you want the goods, ie: Ryan Gosling topless, watch this.
“Seriously? It’s like you’re Photoshopped!”
Beautiful. The movie is totally worth a watch. Or two.
It’s been helping me keep things together these past few days.
Well… it’s been a wonderful and challenging time.
Here be my prayers for ease.