My weekly ritual for looking at the week that was. Lateness of this log brought by the “Exhaustion with no name”. I’m constantly exhausted and I don’t know why. Logging time. I went to an ashram. For real! It was my first time at an ashram, and it was actually pretty awesome. It involved mostly chanting and beautiful surroundings. Also, swinging on a swing, conversations with a wise friend and lots of sunlight. A breath for adventure and new experiences. People. What are they like!? Why they be so confusing?!? I don’t know, but I’ve had experiences this week of people being… “human” and not “peopling” in the right way,…

My weekly ritual for looking at the week that was. For this week’s log, I want to write about Big Things that Happened and at the same time I want to Silent Retreat everything that happened. So I might do both. Also, I have lost track of which week this log applies to, so I’m just going to log and leave it at that. “She’s a writer”. I actively heard those words. I wasn’t meant to hear the words, but I did, and it made me so happy I was positively glowing for a long while afterwards. Even so, I can tell my heart is not big enough to hold…

My weekly ritual for looking at the week that was. Nothing much happened this week… but there were a lot of fairy tales. It’s logging time. I’ve been feeling pretty good lately. The heaviest feelings seem to have paused. A breath of gratitude for this. I feel mostly at peace. I’ve discovered this tv series called “Once Upon a Time”, and I’ve been hopelessly addicted to it. It’s a great way to explore the subject of fairy tales, something I feel strongly and ambivalently about. Work. It’s just… boring and work-y. I swear I have moments when I feel a certain deep seated “sickness”, and I don’t want to serve…

My weekly ritual for looking at the week that was. Surprise! It’s skip-a-week log! Because I couldn’t even at the start of the week, and then the log took too long. We’re here now, and that’s what matters. It wasn’t a good week, but then again, I’m not in a good place right now. The title of this log “Deeper into Sadness” is a reference to a process I decided to go through during the weekend. I had had enough of having “one foot in hope one foot in surrendering” so I made a commitment to go fully into grief and “letting go”. It was… interesting. When I was sad,…

My weekly ritual for looking at the week that was. Let’s just state that since my life is full of hard stuff, all my logs will be late. At least for now. I started this log late last week and now it’s this week, so I’m logging for two. Because sometimes that’s how it goes. Every week I am faced with the daunting task of coming up with new words to describe my pain. I am at a loss for words, stories, metaphors. I am in excruciating pain. I cry so hard that my housemate overhears me and asks me if I’m ok. The answer is always “no”, but there…